The Mostly Unabridged Chronicles of malackey

An Exercise in Narcisisim

That's Ms Malackey to you
External Services:
  • malackey@livejournal.com
  • malackey1
  • malackey
Beautiful creature! Your essence enthralls me! I am sleepless without you and sleepless within you--you are madness incarnate. I live not a moment without the vision of you before me. You are perfect; you are everything. Love will come to you from me and only me. You will have none other. Do not cross me, my sweet, remember your lovely neck will be chopped as soon as I require it...besideserato

It's probably best to mention now that I hate filling these things out.

I was born naked, helpless and screaming. I've overcome those handicaps to become the misanthrope, cynic and voyeur you now see before you.
I am smarter than you.
I swear too much.
I don't drink anymore, and all my drugs are prescription.
I am a bitter old hag waiting to happen.
I spend entirely too much money on makeup, which I barely use and promptly lose.
I am fiercely loyal.
I once spent an entire paycheque on a pair of shoes.
I love with a vengence.
I hate. Oh, how I hate.
I'm a hardass when it counts.
I'm a marshmallow the rest of the time.
I am my daddy's girl.
I am impatient.
I am everyone's favorite bartender.
I am obsessed with my hair colour.
I am independent to a fault.
I am waiting for someone to save me from myself.
I work too hard.
I don't make enough money.
I am a mess.
I don't know who I am.
I don't know where I'm going, but I know who I want to take with me.
I am Thursday's Child.

a clockwork orange, abortion rights, adventure, being bipolar, being insubordinate, being pretentious, bend it like beckham, bitchery, boys, brangelina, bridezilla, brownies, bruises, canada, chocolate, cocktails, coldplay, combat, comedy, corporate overlords, darwin, day after tomorrow, days of our lives, department of homeland security, destruction, diamonds, dim sum, dodgeball, doing my nails, drinking, drinking at work, emotional co-dependence, ex-boyfriends, fantasy boyfriend league, film noir, financial slavery, fuck, fucked up relationships, fucking with stupid people, gay rights, gin and tonic, going back to college, goodbye, guinness, hysterical living, insubordination, it's just a phase, laughing, leamington, logistics, lust, maiming, manicures, matthew good, mayhem, misandry, misanthropy, mocking others, money, morrissey, murder, my left eye, naps, old money, other people's pets, other's misfortune, painting, paying the rent, pedicures, pedophobia, pelee island winery, petty office theft, pho, photography, pirates, pitching a fit, plotting, pop culture, reading, san francisco, sarcasm, satire, schemes, screaming, seattle, seduction, sex, shenanigans, shiraz, shoes, shopping, sin city, singing in bars, sleeping in on weekends, socially inappropriate behaviour, stoli, sugardaddies, sunday morning, superbowl hysteria, sushi, the daily show, the spare bedroom, throwing tantrums, tiffany & co, tinfoil hats, toad the wet sprocket, unfriending total losers, vacations, visiting my friends, vodka, your boyfriend